Tag: Victory

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Victory

Village building

The age old saying, rings true when raising children – it takes a village. But what if you don’t have a village, what if you are lone rangers, completely independent and don’t have family to step in when you need or want them to.

You build your own village, one person at a time.

Homes of Victory

Raising children is hard work, we cannot beat around the bush. Yes it is rewarding, yes it can be fun and all of those things, but break it all down, it is hard work: Emotionally, physically and we can’t forget financially.

If there is one thing that will make raising children easier and fun-ner (is that even a word?), is doing life with other like-minded people. You may already have your village set and be totally content. On the other hand, you may be feeling alone, and don’t know how to meet like minded people, let alone strangers.

Rest assured, as the leader in your home, as a person of influence in your home, you have all the the tools you need to build a village. It will take time and effort, but your efforts will be greatly rewarded by a sense of belonging, a sense of not doing it on your own, a sense of being able to connect. Life is better together right!

Homes of Victory is designed to be a place of support and a place of community. We are here to assist and point you in the right direction for help. Please reach out and contact us and allow up to support you in building your own village.

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Victory

let me rephrase that…

If we ask the right questions, we can change the world with the right answers.”

Ogwo David Emenike

I feel like everytime I speak to my kids they give me a life lesson in return. At the moment, my four year old is giving me a run for my money. The latest phrase out of her mouth is, ” I’m four, I can do what I want”- all said with a hand on her hip. That might very well be true in her mind, but the reality is far removed from that. She pulls the phrase out in context which makes me proud and on the other hand completely frustrated.

The thing I am learning through this season is, if I direct her in a way that she doesn’t realise she is being directed in then she complies. She still feels like she is in charge and is doing ‘ what she wants’.

In leadership – at times, we need to sit back and look at challenges and issues within our teams and projects and pinpoint the RIGHT question to get to the RIGHT answer. It is great to brainstorm the issue and circle back around to parked ideas, and label something as innovative… but if the right question is not asked – the right answer will not be found.

It’s the same with my four year old – if I fight her on the issue of ‘doing what she wants’, I wouldn’t be achieving my goals of getting her to do what I want – like brushing her teeth. If I roll with the punches so to speak, I need to ask the right questions and get her to give me the ‘right’ answer which is in essence obedience. Are you following me?

The question may not be a matter of how, it may be a matter of who. The answer may not be a matter of when, it may be a matter of why. If we ask questions others are afraid to ask, if we seek the answers that others may be too meek to seek, things will start to change – for the better.

Going back to my example – my home is actually calmer because I chose to rephrase my questions to make sure I still get the ‘ right’ answer – but I only get that by asking the ‘ right’ question. She can believe what she wants in her mind – she may think she is doing what she wants – but she’s not. What the outcome is – is a calm home – a change for the greater good of my family. I know she will grow out of this, and I know we will move onto the next challenge.

If I am prepared to rephrase, I am prepared for the best outcome.

Homes of Victory

How can you rephrase your questions / directions / etc… in your home?

How could you apply this in your role as a leader in your home and sphere of influence?

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Victory

Silence

Silence is of different kinds and breathes different meanings.

Charlotte Brontë, author of Villette

What do you think about when you hear the word silence. For me it is two fold. My first thought is my kids must be doing something sneaky – or they are asleep (which is highly unlikely). My second thought is – I really want it sometimes. Just for a moment, but it seems elusive. What do you think of when you hear the word silence?

The things is, when I do get to a place where there is silence, my thoughts fill my mind and their seems to be an outpouring of thoughts, voices, ideas etc… It almost feels noisier in my mind than in the world that surrounds me. The thing about silence that I particularly love is, it gives me a chance to thread my thoughts, learnings and ideas into a meaningful pattern, that gives me more go, when the real life noise starts again. For me silence doesn’t happen during meditation or actual physical silence, it usually occurs for me, somewhere in the early hours of the morning, as I sit on my back deck listening to the birds as they call to one another as the sun rises. For me it’s thinking time, its figuring out time, its rising and shining time.

I love it how Charlotte Bronte frames the idea of silence. Silence is different things to different people – the thing is what do you do with your silence? Are you recharged by it? Are you too busy listening to the negative that you can’t escape even in the silence? Are you refusing to stop and let the silence, take you to a place of rejuvenation? A place of working things out – of taking time to process decision, challenges and the like.

It’s a challenge – don’t get me wrong I know it. I’ve had days where I’ve just taken a walk, stepped outside and given myself time out from the dramas of the kids or the day. At lunch time at work, I go for a walk to clear my head, I change my framework for a moment – to get silence and clarity. What do you do?

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Victory

Surrender

As we find ourselves, waking up this Good Friday, the day we remember the ultimate sacrifice Jesus made, dying on a Roman cross in order to conquer death for all of humanity. I find myself asking the question,

What if victory means surrender?

Often, we think of victory as winning, as being the best, as making the biggest sacrifice in order to make it to the top. When I think of Victory, in context of the cross, in terms of Jesus death and resurrection, the word that plays over and over in my heart is surrender. For Jesus to be Victorious He Surrendered.

Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.

Luke 22: 42 (NIV)

The humanness of surrender seems like such a difficult concept in the 21st Century.   The advocacy of “me” and “what I want” seems to drown out any other social concept in humanity.  Jesus was the ultimate servant leader, who put himself last, who laid down His life, the ultimate sacrifice, in doing so conquering death for all of humanity. When we gather this Easter, however that may look for you – together as a family, with friends or for those who are still only able to connect online, take some time to consider, that to be victorious – it takes surrender. Surrender to the one who is victorious over death, the one who sacrificed it all – that we might live. Jesus didn’t come to Earth, with a set of rules, nor did He come with any other intention of bringing freedom wrapped up in love, mercy, and grace.

Whatever your opinion is of church, Christians, and religion, set those thoughts aside and focus on Jesus and the victory He has over death, the surrender, the sacrifice He made for you. For all of humanity. Take a moment to pause and reflect.

  16 For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.

John 3:16 (NIV)

Want to know more about Jesus, more about Easter, more about the bible

Alpha: https://www.alpha.org.au/try or search for an online Easter service online.

Please contact us, if we can help you any further. Love to you all this Easter.

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Victory

#homesofvictory

Success for leadership is . . . knowing the great art of directing others without their noticing it.

Anonymous
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Victory

#homesofvictory

Change is inevitable. Growth is optional.

John Maxwell
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Victory

#kidlogic: lizards

“ Mum… my friend Lucy is a thorny devil.”

“A what?”

“ A thorny devil”

“ Really”

“ Yes, her Grammy told her that she was, and if she wasn’t careful she would be thrown into the fire”

“ Well that’s not very nice..” doubting the conversation was relayed correctly.

“ No it’s not.”

Two weeks later… I’m serious she thinks about things in depth…

“ Mum where do Thorny Devils live?”

“ I don’t know sweetheart.”

“ I think they are naughty people… where do naughty people live?”

“ Naughty people can live anywhere..”

“ Oh, I’m glad there are none in Brisbane.” She sounded so relieved… as she simply decided how life is.

“ I hope you don’t call any one a Thorny Devil… it’s not a nice thing to say.”

“ Oh no I don’t, but Lucy does.”

“ Well make sure you always use kind words.”

“ Okay Mum”

A week later and it finally clicked in my mind that a thorny devil is a lizard, gee I need to scrub up on my animal species. It all makes perfect sense… now. Upon sharing my new found knowledge with Lalee, the response was:

“ What! Do naughty people get turned into lizards… Oh my goodness.”

Sigh…. This is going to be a long conversation.

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Victory

#kidlogic: fractions

Every year we celebrate Chinese New Year as my husband and his family are from a Malaysian / Chinese heritage. Upon explaining to Lalee who had just turned 4  why we celebrate Chinese New Year… she asked Why… My response was because Daddy is Chinese, and you and your brother are half Chinese.

“ What about you?” she replied

“ I’m Australian” I said.

After taking some time to think about it… Lalee finally said, “ You can be my half… So, I’ll be half Chinese and so can you”… aww sweetness.

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Victory

it’s the little things

Victory is about recognizing all the work that went into achieving your dream. 

Tommy Hilfiger

One catch phrase that is often spoken in our home is “a little bit of help goes a long way”. Whether it is putting one dish in the dishwasher and not on the bench, whether it is getting all of the clothes into the actual clothes basket – those things as parents where we mutter, why do I have to do that, when you are old enough… any way enough of my ranting.

When we realise, a little bit and a little bit more and then some more equals achievement. Goals suddenly become achievable. Unlike goal setting when we are in charge of the goals we set and work towards, life has a way of challenging us, growing us and keeping us on our toes. When we break down what we have succeeded in – whether you got through one load of washing with your baby today, or drove your teenager to footy training without yelling, or even cooking dinner at a reasonable time – these things all add up. These things contribute to the bigger picture of family life – the victories in life.

I picked up my son from a friends house one day and the friends dad wanted to speak to me. I had this sharp split second thought of ‘on no what did he do’. He asked me if it was normal for my boy to put his dishes in the sink after dinner… I said yeah, we all do after dinner. He looked so surprised and said, I didn’t know kids did that. What I didn’t say was, every night for the last seven years we have asked him to put his dishes in the sink, the victory being he happened to remember to do it at a friends house. It’s perspective. Kids can do it – little by little, it may seem repetitive as a parent, but the little by little turns into a victory.

This is only a simple example, but what I am saying is – whatever it is that you are working towards – in your family life, in your career, in your personal journey through life – change is possible, your goals are possible – but it will be one step at a time – bit by bit. One other thing, it will be done out of sight – what we taught our boy (all of our kids) wasn’t done in public – it was in the privacy of our own home. What he learnt in here – he applied out there.

One last thing – don’t let the victory no matter how small go un- celebrated. I told my son I was proud of his behaviour at his friends house – spoke that encouragement over his life – it was a victory worth celebrating.

The great victory, which appears so simple today, was the result of a series of small victories that went unnoticed.

Paulo Coelho
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Victory

#kidlogic: kangaroo

This conversation happened in the car and I am so thankful the kids couldn’t see my face…

Lalee(L):“ Mum can I ride a kangaroo?”

Mum(M): No darling you can’t”

L :“ Can I when I’m bigger?”

M:“ No darling,  no one rides Kangaroos”

Moe (M):“ I bigger”.

L:“ Can babies?”

M:“ No – kangaroo’s backs are not strong enough to have people ride them”

L:“ Oh…. I know who can?”

M:“ Who?”
L:“ God can”

Trying not to laugh I asked why…

L: “He has no bottom.”

M” I bottom”.

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Victory

#homesofvictory

   Crying does not indicate that you are weak. Since birth, it has always been a sign that you are alive.

Charlotte Brontë, author of Jane Eyre
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Victory

#homesofvictory

The most influential of all educational factors is the conversation in a child’s home.

William Temple

As parents prepare for the school year ahead (in Australia), one thing to remember and hold close is, we as parents are our kids first teacher. They look to us for everything – unconditional love, guidance, discipline, growth and development. What words are you speaking into your child’s heart – no matter if they are 1, 10 or 30… What conversations do you have as a family about other people, about the world we live in. These are critical to their education – make them positive, make them a special part of their day, use it to learn together, be curious together and most of all grow together. That’s how families living in victory are made – together.

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Victory

Together

The most important key to successful leadership is your ability to direct and challenge the very best that is in those whom you lead.

Anonymous
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About

about: Justin & Alicia

We are a dynamic parenting duo with three incredible kids in our lives. We have embarked on diverse careers paths including project management, product design, program coordination, innovation economy development and leading people at the same time as building a family while continuing our careers. Along the way we somehow lost sight of the goals we had before parenthood, we lost sight of who we are as individuals and as a couple, aside from children. After a couple of years of intense stress, we stopped to take a deep breath and set aside time to reset due to the growing realisation that if we didn’t make the necessary adjustments, we could risk losing each other and everything we had dedicated to achieve. Now we want to support those of you experiencing similar challenges and changes that comes with having children. We are focused on supporting parents in the season of kids (of any age), we get that it can be joyful, overwhelming, exciting, scary, eye opening and downright hard. Join us on this adventure, that in one sense is living the dream and in another sense so crazy and wild that we wish we could press the pause button… just for a minute.

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Victory

Brave

I was out riding in the bush with my Dad leading the way. I must say after a while, I was very conscious of how much fitter he is, than me. We were having a great time, exploring, he was ahead of me, and called out to go down a different path. All I could see up ahead as I rounded the bend was a massive hill. My Dad knowing me as he does, turned around and said: “It’s not as big as you think”. I laughed… does he not remember how unfit I am… He was right, as we rode up the hill, it actually wasn’t as difficult or as steep as I first thought. What he said next, was a revelation of brave. We stopped at the top for a breather and he said:

I have to be brave to say that. Every time I see it I think it’s too big, but every time I do it I remember it’s not so bad.

Homes of Victory – Dad

It got me thinking, how often do we see challenges in life, events that happen, people around us, as something ‘ massive’ – something bigger than it is, something more daunting than it really needs to be?

Do we look at everything with defeated thinking – for me in that moment of looking at the hill, my first thought was I’ll have to hop off my bike and walk – so embarrassing next to my fitter than me Dad… The thing, is we may KNOW it, we may REMEMBER it, but when we see it we fear. At this point, we all have a choice – do we choose BRAVE or do we choose to STAND DOWN?

I don’t know about you, but I want to choose brave – in the little things and in the big things. I want to explore the mountain tops that were worth the challenge, I was the people around me to be valued, I want the events that occur in my life to be added to the lessons learnt file.

So in light of this revelation of brave – what choices will you make today – to choose brave?