Tag: strong

Categories
Victory

lean into the discomfort

I posted this blog post in April 2021… I wanted to share it again as we all have a story to share, a story to encourage and a story to touch lives around you… enjoy.

Last night I was privileged to go to the graduation of a leadership development program of which my husband was part of. What amazed me – was the journey that every participant of which their was 20 went on, to get to the end of the program. The program was jam packed with leadership tools which formed a final toolkit, it involved more soul searching and personal development that you could poke a stick at the the most wonderful part of it was – the stories of victory, the stories of ‘we made it’ that shone through.

Often at a graduation ceremony we don’t get to hear – just how much blood, sweat and tears went into the achievement. We only tend to see the smile, the handshake, the certificate and camera flash. This ceremony was different. Each and every graduate had an opportunity to share a few words about their experience – in an in-conversation style presentation. My eyes brimmed with tears, as one by one the stories of transformation were explained. The stories of growing confidence, the stories of how now, they are closer to their families because of what they learnt, the stories of how they felt like they took up too much space in this world – but now realize that they as a person are amazing.

Do you have a story to tell? Have you experienced a growth journey of some kind? It may not be as intense as what these graduates experienced. It may not have been a facilitated type of personal or professional growth – but at some point, you must have lent into the discomfort and come out bigger, better and stronger for it. To the leaning in – I say thank you – thank you for wanting to be a better person, thank you for putting in the effort to change yourself and therefore your world.

Homes of Victory started out because we as a family experienced the most trying times of our lives. We made a choice to stick it out, to lean into the discomfort – even if it meant gritting our teeth and saying I love you – even when those thoughts were in our hearts but it was dreadfully hard to say Our heart for people of every stage of life and especially those with young families is to be supported and encouraged to lean into the discomfort – to grow – to influence – to live life victorious.

We know life throws us into all sorts of wild situations – ones we never imaged, ones we wouldn’t wish on any one – but you know what – you are brave, you are made for this moment. Even when it seems overwhelming and overbearing – lean into it, learn from it, grow from it. When the season changes – you’ll be able to look back and reflect. Make sure you do – reflect and reflect until you feel you have celebrated the wins, the best you can, when you have unpacked the disappointments the best you can, when you can pick up the growth in yourself and those who have experienced with you. Use each season to become a better person, to be all that you can be. Don’t be scared of expectations – what you expect of yourself or what others expect. Change your perspective and simply lean in.

After the learning, after the wild has calmed down remember to share your story. Share it with intention to encourage, share it with the intention to show others that it can be done. Your story is a powerful tool that will change the lives of those around you.

It’s a story about victory that will touch the lives of everyone… It’s powerful.  

Derek Luke

Categories
Victory

#homesofvictory

Do your little bit of good where you are; it’s those little bits of good put together that overwhelm the world.

Desmond Tutu
Categories
Victory

# homesofvictory

A strong woman looks a challenge in the eye and gives a wink

Gina Carey

Categories
Victory

What is it about you?

This is a question I love to ask, but hate to answer… We all have a unique personality, with unique skill sets and abilities. What is it about you, that firstly makes you, you and secondly, who are you to other people? The influence you have in your world – the influence you have on those around you – at home, work and play – you may never know its extent. What we do know is, we have capacity to influence those around us – whichever way we choose

Does it matter to you, what type of influence you have?

At times we don’t know what influence we have, other times we find out, other times we receive feedback that is critical or unkind. How do you respond to that?

I often respond with reflection – firstly is the criticism fair, is it true, is it partly true? Of course it hurts and at times, we need to choose not to let it affect us, other times, we need to take it on board and use it to grow.

So then, What is it about you? What makes you unique? What type of influence do you have in your world?

Please don’t move on from this question without spending a little time reflecting on who you are, the influence you have and the amazing contribution you make to those in your world.

I hold that a strongly marked personality can influence descendants for generations.

Beatrix Potter
Categories
Victory

#kidlogic: kangaroo

This conversation happened in the car and I am so thankful the kids couldn’t see my face…

Lalee(L):“ Mum can I ride a kangaroo?”

Mum(M): No darling you can’t”

L :“ Can I when I’m bigger?”

M:“ No darling,  no one rides Kangaroos”

Moe (M):“ I bigger”.

L:“ Can babies?”

M:“ No – kangaroo’s backs are not strong enough to have people ride them”

L:“ Oh…. I know who can?”

M:“ Who?”
L:“ God can”

Trying not to laugh I asked why…

L: “He has no bottom.”

M” I bottom”.

Categories
Blue Print

blueprint finale

Hooray! Congratulations! Well Done!  

Here at Homes of Victory we are genuinely so excited for you and your family. We hope you feel more equipped, have grown closer together as a family and most of all had fun.

You should be so proud of yourselves that you worked through creating a family values statement, learnt more about yourselves and each other, set goals  and created a family action plan. We would love to hear how it works for you and your family so drop us a line, you never know who else you will encourage to create a family blueprint.

Once again – whooo hoooo! You are amazing!

Categories
Leadership

in conversation with Luke & Heidi

I would like to introduce our second in-conversation session. Sometimes it’s encouraging to hear how other families do life. We’ve known Luke and Heidi for eight years and met at a parenting course – of which they were presenting. These guys have been a source of encouragement to us over the years. Teaching us to see the positive in everything and to not sweat the small stuff – everything is small by the way. They’ve run businesses for many years and now Luke is a state manager and Heidi works as a pediatric nurse. They live a life of adventure and fun. We hope you are encouraged by this conversation.

Who are the members of your family?

Luke (40), Heidi (40), Ariella (15), Noah (13), Sian (11), Rose(8)

Are you planners or do you go with the flow?

Hmmmm – a bit of both. We have a lot of things planned like sports certain days and all sorts of school activities the kids like to be involved in. But we also can go with the flow if needed… like last minute dinner parties with friends work well for us, we more plan things as we go than have them booked in months in advance. Unless you mean planners with what type of family we want? In that case we are definitely planners rather than go with the flow. We deliberately talk about the type of family we want to be like and intentionally work towards that.

What does your normal week look like?

Sometimes chill and sometimes crazy!!!!! My big two kids like to join every team (multiple sports teams, debating team, musical, study groups) so at times between them we have something on every day, then there are seasons ( or terms) where it’s pretty chilled and calm. It also depends on my work – sometimes I work random shifts all over the place and other times just one day a week. So we kind of need to be able to adapt and go with the flow or we would fall apart! I keep the mindset “ it always works out in the end”… and it always does. Sometimes one week may just be crazier than others! One thing the same everyday if every week – we always have dinner together. Always. No TV during the week either.

Your family is passionate about foster care. What effect does this have on your family life?

Sometimes it’s a huge effect – like when we suddenly had a newborn baby with a days’ notice! And he stayed for 5 months. Or when we had two toddlers for a weekend who were extreme levels of activity and behaviour which took every single second and me and Luke’s time to watch them and keep them safe. Other times it’s just lovely and adds to our home. Some little babes we have had for a weekend and the kids adore them. It’s like a fun playmate all weekend and they absolutely love having them to care for. The conversations we get to have around topics such as “ why is this child in care”, “ why they have been taken away from their parents”, “ why certain foster children behave the way they do”, “ why the teenagers in foster homes might act the way they do.. I feel it brings a huge level of compassion, understanding, empathy and life lessons for our children they may not have been exposed to otherwise.

What measures have you put in place to make it a great experience for your family?

I have heard from many grown adults whose parents used to foster, they hated it. So we go to great lengths to make sure the kids have a positive experience with it – or as much as we possibly can. This means keeping the negative conversations about foster care and the system to grownups. We allow the kids the express their feelings openly – so they feel comfortable to say , ‘ I wish the baby wasn’t here” – knowing that it is okay you feel that way today, but remember this baby has nowhere to be other than right here, right now. They have not been cared for well and had a tough time, isn’t it a blessing we can help them? They won’t be here long but aren’t we blessed we get to impart some love and joy into their lives for a short time” – etc…

I also made a conscious effort to not say to my children ‘ I can’t do that” or “ I don’t have time for you because of the baby” so sometimes that is exhausting for me. To suddenly have a newborn and be living on that sudden lack of sleep – but not say to your biological children you don’t want to read to them a book because you’re tired is hard. But I feel it is important to do. Another measure we have put in place is we have told the department we only take children under a certain age.

What advice would you give to a family working through the family blueprint, designing the family life you want?

Think long term not short term. Think about the outcomes you want. It’s worth putting some effort into making the blueprint for your family. If you have a goal then you can focus on that… over time it will hopefully come to pass. We have always been big on manners and respect. Sometimes when they are young you can think it’s not working and it’s futile and then one day you get a text from a friend saying ” your kid was the only good one at the party who said thank you for dinner”. and you suddenly realise it’s all paying off.

Family life – what kind of life do you want? If you don’t plan it, you may find you’re quickly going through life thinking ‘ This isn’t what I wanted for my life’. But if you never take the time to plan it, it won’t change. It’s not hard to create the life you imagine, you just need to take time to plan it and focus on achieving it. What’s important to you? What do you see in the future for your family? What steps do you need to take to achieve that?

My advice is pick a few main family goals and work towards those. For example ours are:

  1. To create contributing human beings, acting in their giftings knowing and bringing love, joy, peace… knowing life is about more than them and they should serve a greater vision.
  2. To create family dynamic that will last until we die- true family connection that will support each other, laugh with each other and cry with each other into each other’s old age.
  3. Fun – adventure – health.

Does the blue print work for a family like yours where planning isn’t your thing?

Yes. When you answer the long term questions you don’t need to wake up each day trying to answer the little questions. When the big questions are answered, the little questions don’t need to be thought about and discussed all the time as we already know the answer to the day to day questions. For example ‘ Should we go to church today?” – the long terms goal is God loving, church going, Christ honoring family – therefore short term questions of should we go to church doesn’t need to be asked as the long term goal, already tells us yes.