Don’t trade in your integrity for influence.
Richie Norton
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#homesofvictory
Tag: family
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#homesofvictory
When you feel overwhelmed, remember; A little at a time is how it gets done. One thing, one task, one moment at a time.
Author Unknown
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my own makerspace
In recent times, maker spaces have become extremely popular in public libraries. A space where members have free access to tools, equipment and the like, things they would not normally have access to. Some libraries, house sewing machines, 3D printers, wood lathes, jigsaws, drills, tools that can be borrowed such as screwdrivers etc… It has become popular to borrow the item or use it at the library rather than buy it for one particular task. From the growth of makerspaces, communities with similar interests have grown, no longer are public libraries about book clubs, they are about sewing groups and budding designers. Libraries are also introducing STEM packs for parents to borrow like robots and coding information, toy swags and other innovative ways to bring to library to the home and users.
Upon reflecting on this, even though I work in this field and love it, I feel I actually have no time to spend in these kinds of creative spaces. What I need is a makerspace in my mind… a way to make space for creativity, a way to reduce my open tabs to none and just have the capacity to be creative. I need to admit that my creativity of late has been reduced to moving my pot plants around on my deck – in a bid to make it ‘ look nicer’ and to try my hand at painting. Of which I feel I am failing miserably at, as I sit down to focus on a tutorial and within 10 minutes I’m up because I forgot to do something (more) important.
Usually, I am a swimmer and swimming laps, although boring for some, actually helps me clear my mind and focus. My best thinking occurs, following the black line up and down the pool. I’ve let my discipline slip and allowed my incredible capacity to make up excuses take over… oh the pool is shut, no… it’s open again… wow its winter and it’s gonna be cold in a heated pool…All of which holds little truth, but it’s enough to keep me warm in bed, when I should be swimming rather than complaining that I don’t have any maker space left in my brain…
What I am getting at is, we all need a makerspace in our minds – to be able to deal better with the everyday. To deal better when our kids throw the tenth tantrum of the day or when our other half can’t find what they’re looking for, even when it’s right in front of them… ( sorry love but it’s true)…
What provides you with your maker space? Meditation? Sport? Reading? Sewing? Drawing? Creating?
Do you allow yourself time to have that headspace?
What impacts does it have on you when you don’t have time to yourself?
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#homesofvictory
Today’s excuses are tomorrow’s regrets dressed in disguise.
Steven Furtick
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What is it about you?
This is a question I love to ask, but hate to answer… We all have a unique personality, with unique skill sets and abilities. What is it about you, that firstly makes you, you and secondly, who are you to other people? The influence you have in your world – the influence you have on those around you – at home, work and play – you may never know its extent. What we do know is, we have capacity to influence those around us – whichever way we choose
Does it matter to you, what type of influence you have?
At times we don’t know what influence we have, other times we find out, other times we receive feedback that is critical or unkind. How do you respond to that?
I often respond with reflection – firstly is the criticism fair, is it true, is it partly true? Of course it hurts and at times, we need to choose not to let it affect us, other times, we need to take it on board and use it to grow.
So then, What is it about you? What makes you unique? What type of influence do you have in your world?
Please don’t move on from this question without spending a little time reflecting on who you are, the influence you have and the amazing contribution you make to those in your world.
I hold that a strongly marked personality can influence descendants for generations.
Beatrix Potter
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#kidlogic: emergency
I grew up in a home where nothing was an emergency unless it really was life or death. Sympathy was one thing that was rarely dished out. So, in learning through the days of motherhood, I’ve come to realise that I too, don’t see many things as an emergency, or dish out sympathy lightly.
My four year old on the other hand, thinks everything is an emergency. So when she screams it from the yard, everyone in the street is alerted to the ‘emergency’. The latest so called emergency was the fact my two year old spilt water over his bike. When Lalee screamed ‘emergency’ I went to her and asked what the emergency was. The response… “ Moe’s bike has water leaking (it was wet from the rain). I think we need to call the bike plumber”.
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#homesofvictory
You don’t have to be a person of influence to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they’ve taught me.
Scott Adams
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#kidlogic: fractions
Every year we celebrate Chinese New Year as my husband and his family are from a Malaysian / Chinese heritage. Upon explaining to Lalee who had just turned 4 why we celebrate Chinese New Year… she asked Why… My response was because Daddy is Chinese, and you and your brother are half Chinese.
“ What about you?” she replied
“ I’m Australian” I said.
After taking some time to think about it… Lalee finally said, “ You can be my half… So, I’ll be half Chinese and so can you”… aww sweetness.
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#homesofvictory
Not the cry, but the flight of the wild duck, leads the flock to fly and follow.
Chinese Proverb
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#kidlogic: kangaroo
This conversation happened in the car and I am so thankful the kids couldn’t see my face…
Lalee(L):“ Mum can I ride a kangaroo?”
Mum(M): No darling you can’t”
L :“ Can I when I’m bigger?”
M:“ No darling, no one rides Kangaroos”
Moe (M):“ I bigger”.
L:“ Can babies?”
M:“ No – kangaroo’s backs are not strong enough to have people ride them”
L:“ Oh…. I know who can?”
M:“ Who?”
L:“ God can”
Trying not to laugh I asked why…
L: “He has no bottom.”
M” I bottom”.
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#homesofvictory
Crying does not indicate that you are weak. Since birth, it has always been a sign that you are alive.
Charlotte Brontë, author of Jane Eyre
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it’s not how
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.
General George Smith Patton, Jr.
I love the mind of a child. I love watching and learning. At times I ask my children to do something, and the way they do it is rather surprising. As adults we can assume that children know how to do it the way we want it done, without telling them. Other times, we are perplexed why they don’t know how to do something we’ve shown them ten times over.
An example of this, is a recent three day screen ban in our home. I won’t go into why the ban was put in place, but what I will say is be prepared to follow through on a threat – even it is causes you pain! Any way, on day one, when I was told, “I’m bored”, ” I don’t know what to do”. The resounding response was go outside and play. We are very blessed with a back yard, and in that yard we have a grassed area big enough to kick a ball and gardens filled with native plants and a mature mango tree. Before I knew it, my two eldest children were designing a treehouse, they were pestering my husband for use of a drill and had called their grandpa and organised for him to bring over some items they needed to build it. Within the three days, a basic tree house was built. No screens, no fights, no tantrums, no disobedience. Plain and simple – getting along, communicating, teamwork and fun.
They surprised me no end, and I was very proud how they copped the ban on the chin, and focused on what they could do, rather than what they knew the couldn’t ( or rather were not allowed to do)
Sometimes, we need to remember in life, we don’t need to over complicate things, by adding the ‘ how’ into every conversation, but rather take a deep breath – ask, tell, direct, whatever the basic instruction maybe – and let the how take care of itself.
We thought we would add some fun to Homes of Victory this year. At times we can overthink, how we parent, how we are as people and how we can always be just that little bit better.
What sparked this new series called Kid Logic, was a big clean out – yes Marie Kondo style over our summer. During which I found a whole heap of notes and stories I had written down about the kids when they were younger. The smiles it gave me and the laugh out loud moments I captured – need to be shared… why?
So you know that we know parenting is interesting, parenting can be frustrating and parenting is an experience like no other.
For privacy – I’ve called the characters (aka my kids) Lalee, Moe and Sparkie. You’ll see their personalities shine, you’ll relate the them and us, but most of all we hope you enjoy and remember we are living the dream… even if it looks a little different to what we imagined…
Lastly, please share your kidlogic moments with us – we would love to hear all about them.
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Resistance
Nothing gets stronger without resistance.
Steven Furtick
In leadership, nothing provokes frustration like resistance. We all have ways of working around it, like change management, innovation, the like it or lump it mentality – the list goes on. May I add here, when parents face resistance from their offspring, many of these work arounds occur too… including ignoring and hoping it goes away…
When we look at resistance in term of lifting weights or exercising – resistance shines in a positive light. When we face resistance we get stronger. When we continue to face the resistance the resistance reduces – as our strength increases.
The question I pose is this – even though resistance in whatever form it comes, can be frustrating – can it also contribute to growth?
We all have that person in our lives, that makes it a little difficult, one where we try to work with them, try to collaborate with them, try to make it the relationship better- sometimes the resistance will always be there – but sometimes it will be the thing that makes us a better person.
I can’t help but put this example in here, I love my kids so much. One thing I have come to realise when I compare them to others ( we try not to but you know it happens) that my kids are not compliant. I mean, not compliant by any means. They are good kids, they do behave well but they are questioners. When I was a kid, I was satisfied when I questioned and got the answer “because I said so” – who agrees right – some times as parents we just say so.
Oh no, not my kids. They question, and negotiate, fuel the conversation with more resistance, add more curiosity and at times it never seems to end. To be honest – I love this trait, we have raised them to be curious and to question – but sometimes I just wish they would accept the answer “because I said so.” With that said, the resistance over the years – and I mean that with kindness, the curiosity we have encountered, the long into the night conversations about the name of the bone in our nose… we know we are definitely more intelligent, more prepared for conversations and know what to expect. In this instance, resistance has made us stronger.
What type of experiences have you had where resistance has made you a better leader? Better parent? Better person?
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#homesofvictory
The most influential of all educational factors is the conversation in a child’s home.
William Temple
As parents prepare for the school year ahead (in Australia), one thing to remember and hold close is, we as parents are our kids first teacher. They look to us for everything – unconditional love, guidance, discipline, growth and development. What words are you speaking into your child’s heart – no matter if they are 1, 10 or 30… What conversations do you have as a family about other people, about the world we live in. These are critical to their education – make them positive, make them a special part of their day, use it to learn together, be curious together and most of all grow together. That’s how families living in victory are made – together.
Homes of Victory 