Where’s your identity?

I was listening to a pod cast ‘ Becoming the Leader Within Us’ by Warren Rustand, where he served as appointment secretary to USA president Gerald Ford and has been the CEO of many companies in his career. In a nutshell a well accomplished businessman. He is also the coauthor of a book titled the Leader Within Us. My goal in listening to this podcast was the glean some further time management skills and to hear how the best of the best time managed a president. I was attuned to listening out for hot tips, and I did glean a few, but what struck a chord with me was the way he wove some very simple yet valuable life lessons into this podcast. After telling story after story about how he managed the Presidents schedule and went home to his own family – a family of 7 children and a faithful wife. The words he spoke that stood out were:

Boom, how does that make you feel? It took me a minute or two to process that. As adults we often spend our waking hours, trying to work out how to be the best at what we do, how to impress, how to align ourselves to be ready for the next promotion… all those things. Yet do we value the opinion of our children? Does their voice matter? For them, we are all they have. What example are we setting? What encouragement are we giving them?

Another famous Dad (and actor) Adam Sandler was also quoted, and I paraphrase, that a big life lesson he learned in fatherhood is that ‘your kids are not keeping score of your career’. 

I love this perspective, to my family and to your family, it actually doesn’t matter what you do (in the 9 – 5), it’s who you are – every other hour of the week. All they see is you when you are home and how you behave when you are with them. It’s a great reminder, to leave some energy in the tank, for when you get home after work, it’s a great reminder to follow through on your promises, it’s a great reminder to stop and think about who you want to be rather than finding your identity in what you do.