Victory is about recognizing all the work that went into achieving your dream.
Tommy Hilfiger
One catch phrase that is often spoken in our home is “a little bit of help goes a long way”. Whether it is putting one dish in the dishwasher and not on the bench, whether it is getting all of the clothes into the actual clothes basket – those things as parents where we mutter, why do I have to do that, when you are old enough… any way enough of my ranting.
When we realise, a little bit and a little bit more and then some more equals achievement. Goals suddenly become achievable. Unlike goal setting when we are in charge of the goals we set and work towards, life has a way of challenging us, growing us and keeping us on our toes. When we break down what we have succeeded in – whether you got through one load of washing with your baby today, or drove your teenager to footy training without yelling, or even cooking dinner at a reasonable time – these things all add up. These things contribute to the bigger picture of family life – the victories in life.
I picked up my son from a friends house one day and the friends dad wanted to speak to me. I had this sharp split second thought of ‘on no what did he do’. He asked me if it was normal for my boy to put his dishes in the sink after dinner… I said yeah, we all do after dinner. He looked so surprised and said, I didn’t know kids did that. What I didn’t say was, every night for the last seven years we have asked him to put his dishes in the sink, the victory being he happened to remember to do it at a friends house. It’s perspective. Kids can do it – little by little, it may seem repetitive as a parent, but the little by little turns into a victory.
This is only a simple example, but what I am saying is – whatever it is that you are working towards – in your family life, in your career, in your personal journey through life – change is possible, your goals are possible – but it will be one step at a time – bit by bit. One other thing, it will be done out of sight – what we taught our boy (all of our kids) wasn’t done in public – it was in the privacy of our own home. What he learnt in here – he applied out there.
One last thing – don’t let the victory no matter how small go un- celebrated. I told my son I was proud of his behaviour at his friends house – spoke that encouragement over his life – it was a victory worth celebrating.
The great victory, which appears so simple today, was the result of a series of small victories that went unnoticed.
Paulo Coelho
Homes of Victory 